Next on the agenda

It seems like we are moving from one fundraiser to the next, which is actually good in many ways. It builds awareness. It raises money (which is much needed!) It keeps our minds busy and not so focused on the wait.

The wait is hard, and of course I think/pray/gaze at their faces every day, multiple times a day, but being busy does not allow me to sit and think TOO hard or TOO long. About anything really! I am not at the stage where it is really difficult. There are moments when it is hard. There are moments when I cry. For example:

The last pictures we received were wonderful.sad/precious. Baby Z is getting chubbier and smiling and drooling. Little M looked beat up, ashy, and he had 3 giant lumps on his face. Two looked like big old bug bites, not sure about the third. We get photos, no info regarding them. I am not complaining,and so thankful we get these photos!

While at the park days after getting the photos, a little girl was running and fell in the gravel. She let out a howl, and her nanny went and scooped her up, cleaned off her legs, hugged her, consoled her, and gave her Neosporin and Band-Aids. I watched and wiped tears from my eyes like a hormonal woman... I was thinking about our kiddos so far away from us, and the recent lumps and bumps, and just crying at the thought of no one running to him. No one comforting him, and trying to take away the pain. Not that no one does, as I want to believe he is in loving hands and is being well cared for, but I don't KNOW. And it is not ME. I want to run to him. I want to ice his little head. I want to cover him and protect him and scoop him up and have him cry on my shoulder. And I can't. Yet.

So we soldier on, and busy ourselves in daily life, and add to it by fundraising. Last weekend we had a relatively small PNO. 11 extra kids plus our own, and it was a fun night. Bonus being that there was a baby girl there who is a month older than Z, who I got to wear for awhile and snuggle, and who just smiled her gummy smile at me all night. Yes, this made me near tears, too!

But the big fundraiser is coming up in a couple weeks, and it is taking some leg work and thought and planning. Friends we have approached, and businesses we have contacted have been generous for the most part, and I am quite pleased with how the donated items are rolling in. Still praying that people will roll in as smoothly to bid on these great items! Scott is helping tremendously with getting donations from businesses, as this is definitely not my comfort zone. I have done more the "personal" requests from people I know, or businesses that I am familiar with, and he has done much more of the "cold call" type walk ins! He is in sales for a living- he is good at this! We still have a ways to go, but it is coming together as only God can make happen.